GPs can now prescribe drugs to stop people being dickheads

Doctors across the UK can now prescribe drugs to stop people turning into dickheads.

The new medication - known as StopDick - will be available on prescription in the new year.

Dr CleverClogs of Aberystwyth University told WalesOnCraic:

“We’ve been working hard on this drug for quite some time now. We know that dickhead levels have reached epidemic proportions worldwide so we also know that demand will be high.

“Last month, we were finally able to start trialling our new drug. We got a load of dickheads in and smacked them up to the tits with the medication. We reported a 45% decrease in the levels of dickheadedness among the group, with a further 26% reporting a complete recovery.”

The new drug is expected to be available to the public in January, bringing hope to millions of people who have to live with dickheads.

Housewife Glenda Throb said:

“I’ll be dragging my dickhead of a husband down the doctors as soon as they get some. Mind you, my GP is a dickhead too so I’m hoping he’ll have been cured by then too. The last time I went in to see him with a headache, he asked me to take off all my clothes and gave me a thorough examination.”

The new drug will come in tablet form and can be taken with or without alcohol.