Senedd to start mass deportations of people who don't say sospan

The Senedd has announced a mass crackdown on people who don’t say sospan properly. 

Officials at the Welsh Government have warned that anyone not pronouncing the word saucepan as ‘sospan’ will be immediately given a leaflet, politely asking them to leave the country.

A spokesman for the Welsh Government told WalesOnCraic:

“We suspect that these people don’t come from around these parts. It’s one of the biggest clues that they don’t belong here so anyone caught saying saucepan with the word ‘sauce’ in it, will be given a nice leaflet, asking them to leave the country. Here in Wales, we proudly say ‘sospan’. We love it so much that we even made a song about it and it’s the best song about sospans in the world. We had it at my dad’s funeral and I even had it at my wedding.

“Wales is a proud country and we’re not going to put up with other people coming in here and telling us how to say sospan. Like any true patriot, if you can’t say sospan correctly, you know where you can go. Mass deportations will start as soon as Reggie starts his shift at 9.30.”

Critics of the scheme say that it hasn’t been thought through properly and would if possible, like to riot to show their displeasure.