Wales First: We want England moved 200 miles to the right

Welsh Street Defence and Super Dooper Ultra Nationalist Party Wales First, have demanded that England move 200 miles to the right in their election manifesto.

The announcement comes four weeks after they demanded that Wales moves 200 miles to the left. But after a meeting at the local Kwik Save, Wales First are now demanding that it’s England who moves and not Wales.

Wales First deputy leader Gladys Pugh told WalesOnCraic:

“Four weeks ago, we told the world that we wanted Wales to move 200 miles to the left. But last night, while I was watching Eastenders, it suddenly dawned on me that it’s THEM that should be moving, not us. Why should we do all the hard work? They’re the ones that came here after us. So we’re writing to Tony Blair or whoever’s in charge to get this sorted once and for all. We are a proud nation and we are fighting to claim our country back.”

Wales First regularly patrol the streets of Wales, making sure that no outside influence disturbs the perfect Welsh way of life (circa 1953).

“We realised that if we moved 200 miles to the left, we’d be nearer the Irish and they never stop talking and I really can’t be doing with that because it gives me a headache.” added Gladys.