Other people's wind chimes voted 'annoying as shit'

Other people’s windchimes have been voted ‘annoying as shit’ in a recent survey to find the UK’s most annoying noise.

The noise topped this year’s charts, which was won last year by Alison Hammond’s laugh.

Professor Jimmy Jangle, who conducted the survey said:

“Other people put these pieces of shit in their gardens and expect others to remain calm and serene but the truth is that it makes them just want to punch people in the face. Even when there’s a slight breeze, these things grind you down. Hour after dreadful hour. You don’t even get used to the noise because they are so unpredictable. I wasn’t surprised when I saw the results of the survey. My neighbours have not long got a wind chime and frankly, I’d like to burn their house down.”

Wind chimes are often used by vegan types who like to annoy people who aren’t sat in restaurants. One wind chime owner said:

“I like to annoy the shit out of my neighbours. I can’t stand them and want them all to move away. I did try letting my dog bark all day but that hasn’t worked so I’ve installed some wind chimes and already I’m getting threatening letters. They seem to be doing the trick.”

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